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Press Kit

Da Facts

Release Date

September 6, 2019


  • English(?)



  • USD $9.99
  • GBP £7.19
  • EUR 8,19€
  • CDN $11.49
  • AUD $14.50


  • Plasterbrain
  • @Plasterbrain
  • Chicago, IL

Social Media


Pizza Game is a full-length satirical dating sim written like bad fanfiction. You play as Kiane, a recent college graduate who is starting a new secretary job in the bizarre and totally-real town of Flordaddle. With her sloppy hygiene, lack of personal funds, and backtalking sentient thought bubble, Kiane seems unlikely to woo her standoffish boss, the handsome and wealthy Mr. Arimnaes -- but she's determined to find a date by the end of the week at virtually any cost.

The only thing stopping her is maybe the fact that Mr. Arimnaes is a serial killer.


  • 7 story routes (4 GxB, 2 GxG, 1 True Route) with 20 total endings
  • 20+ wacky characters to meet and 16 character profiles that update throughout the game
  • Over 180,000 words, most of which are bad
  • Take screenshots using Kiane's camera to unlock Easter Eggs
  • Original soundtrack, CGs, and backgrounds
  • Partial voice acting
  • Unlockable menu announcer voices and author commentary
  • Built-in text-to-speech, keyboard navigation, and audio captions for improved accessibility
  • A fun HTML manual! (I spent a lot of time on it.)


Main Trailer

The main trailer features full voice acting in order to better acclimate viewers to the unusual writing style. In the actual game there are only occasional voice clips, and Roobit speaks in synthetic nonsense sounds.


Pizza Game's main menu. Mr. Arimnaes taunts Kiane with a selection of crappy Pizza ingredients hovering around him. A CG of Roobit with some narration.

Logos and more screenshots can be downloaded using the link below.

Download Images (Zip)


Pizza Game does not technically come from a developer studio of any sort, because it is not supposed to exist, and was summoned by a dark god. The writing, programming, GUI, music, marketing(?) and sound design for Pizza Game were done by Plasterbrain, a Chicago-based freelancer who spends her time composing and writing press kits in the third person. The artwork and character design were done by her brother, YouTube personality and voice actor Brendan Blaber. Pizza Game features partial voice-acting -- most characters are voiced by their real life analogues.


Pizza Game started as a joking proof-of-concept -- otome game based loosely on the writer's group of internet friends that satirized cliches and archetypes of the genre. After a demonstration of the game at Youmacon 2015 generated some interest, the game was developed in earnest.

The writing of Pizza Game follows in the tradition of such works as Nyan Neko Sugar Girls, Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff, and Quarter-Life: Halfway to Destruction, but soon developed into its own unique brand of nonsense.

Truthfully, though, it more closely resembles "sustainable" shitpost works like Girl-chan in Paradise and Senpai Club, which couple bad writing and concepts with excellent sound and visuals, rather than the typical "lo-res" ones which make this genre abrasive. Pizza Game is a tongue-in-cheek deconstruction of otome games as well as a celebration of high-effort trolling as art.


  • None, but my dad thinks it's very a la mode.
  • I don't have any quotes for you either, but if you're really stuck on starting that article, try an all-caps "WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH GAMERGATE?"


Plasterbrain and Scrubbadubs allow for the contents of Pizza Game to be published through video broadcasting services for any commercial or non-commercial purposes. Monetization of videos created containing assets from Pizza Game is legally & explicitly allowed by Plasterbrain. This permission can be found in writing at